147: full circle

i keep dipping in and out of circles;
running in one spot and then to another
everoverworrying that it's never gonna be my place
to say or do or think or feel the way i do
and it always leads me back
to me wondering if
i'll ever




          f    i    n   d



                      my         

place
 
                                                         in

                                                                        the
                                                                       
                                                           

                            world

113: scald

of numbers one to ten:
of indifference and going crazy
of in denial and feeling guilty,

on the scale
of all the things through which i've been living to everything i'm capable of being,
of the truths i've been believing to what i'm trying to be achieving,

on the scale
of greatness and sanity
of good health and charity
of godliness and clarity,

i think i finally understand
where i stand.

because on the scale
of underwhelming limits and limiting overgeneralisation,
of forms zero to infinity,
of anorexic to obesity,
i worry
to a senseless degree
of what i am
on scalea